This afternoon, John and I watched a movie that we had not seen in years, “Rudy.” Earlier this year, John got to hear “Rudy” speak at a Rotary event and we wanted to watch the movie again. It was so much fun! During the holiday season, if you want a great movie with the whole family (a movie that will make no one blush), get this one. It’s a great story.

For those of you who never saw the movie, here’s a summary. A boy is born into a hard-working, blue collar, Catholic family who are huge Notre Dame Football fans. The boy decides early in life that he will attend Notre Dame and play football for the university. Unfortunately his grades, physical size and athletic abilities do not support his dream. He works incredibly hard for many years and he achieves his goals. Although Rudy is technically on the team, he does not dress out for games.

(OK, “dress out” is a term from my junior high PE days. If it is not appropriate for males on a university football team, I do apologize. Please edit as you see fit.)

At the end, Rudy is only allowed to be on the sidelines for one game because someone else gave up their place. The scene in the movie brought me to tears…player after player brought their game jersey to the coach’s office, offering to give up their place on the team so that Rudy could play.

The story reminded me of so many times in my life when I was on that trip, in that room, giving that presentation, at that table, with that group, singing that song, eating that meal, enjoying that evening because someone went out of their way to include me. I didn’t have the grades, talent, experience, money, social standing or political contacts to merit that position. There is no question, I have benefited because others gave me a gift of status that was far beyond anything I deserved.

We have so much. We are so blessed. This year, let’s look for someone who needs what we have so easily. Take them in. Shift the spotlight. Speak comfort. Add a place at the table. Hold a hand. Make an introduction. Buy a meal. Spend some time. Invite them with you. Spread the joy. Buy an extra ticket.

We may change a life.

Friend, I pray that this year we will “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above ourselves, not looking to our own interests but each of us to the interests of the others.” (Philippians 2:3-4)

The family picture displayed on this morning’s newscast was absolutely perfect. The new Dad was beaming. The newborn was wrapped in a pastel blanket. And, Mom looked amazing. Her hair was clean and shining and freshly blown out. Her natural look makeup and sweet bed jacket finished the above-the-fireplace-portrait-ready look. As I watched the anchors congratulate their colleague on becoming a new Mom, I felt more than a little sad.

The segment reminded me of a conversation a friend and I had a few months ago. She shared that she and her husband were hoping to have a second child. This was exciting news and I hugged her and did a little dance. I promised to pray that God’s guidance would be clear. She went on to talk about the things that she would do differently during this second pregnancy. Part of her action plan surprised me; I was shocked that I had never even considered one of the issues that concerned this sweet Mom..

This time, she would make sure to have someone handy to do her hair and makeup before any pictures would be taken. This time, she would get a spray tan (being careful to protect the yet to be born little one) and would have the “right” outfit ready for those first pictures. This time a professional photographer would be with them in the labor and delivery room to make sure that only the most flattering moments would be available to share.

I am guilty. I have seen the “perfect” pictures and I never even thought about what those pictures must have cost those new families. I never considered that those new parents had been doing the most important work of their lives but their pictures looked like they were runway models.

Now, I am not being critical. I encourage folks to do what pleases them within God’s guidance. Please keep taking pictures. I love the ones with sweaty hair tucked into head bands and unshaven dads in scrubs, and, I love the perfect pictures too. But, I will be revising how I comment on those new family pictures. I will tell you about the sweet smiles and not say a thing about anyone’s hair. I will focus on the joy and not on cool clothes. I will see the face of God in your little one and not notice your nails.

It really isn’t about how we look, it is about what we do.

• I applaud the smile of one who rings the bell at the chemo treatment center, celebrating their last treatment.
• I adore the first steps of that one test driving their new hip.
• I love the black marks on skin that direct the path of those important radiation beams.
• I treasure the wave of the veteran who is struggling to make it through another day.
• I thank God for the “zippers” that cover repaired hearts and shoulders and knees and spaces once filled with cancer.

Mary and Joseph probably looked pretty rough on that night so long ago. She had never given birth before; I would bet that she questioned if she was doing anything “right” in that stable. But, rest assured that like every other new parent their smiles of joy had never been brighter.

Relax, My Friend, “Walk into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They don’t fuss with their appearance—but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them. If God gives such attention to the wildflowers, most of them never even seen, don’t you think He’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do His best for you?” (Luke 12:27-28, The Message)

Love,

Jill (just one of God’s kids)

Last night I attend the Escambia County Board of Commissioners’ meeting. I was excited. One item on their agenda meant a lot to John and to me. And so, I went to the meeting room; I signed up as a speaker in support of the agenda item; and, I got settled in and waited.

The first couple of agenda items took a long time. It didn’t surprise me.   I had been in the same room at a previous meeting of the County Commissioners. That meeting took more than 6 hours. And, when they got to the agenda item that interested me, there was a great deal of discussion. Last night, I was ready and prepared to sit and to wait a long time for their discussion of the item that concerned us so very much.

But, after about 20 minutes of proceedings, the process changed. It was as if everyone in the room but me had been informed that a new dance had started. All at once, 9 and 12 items at a time were being brought up and adopted. And suddenly our item was approved with several others in less than 20 seconds. It was done. I wasn’t asked to speak on the item because they did not need (or desire) my input. The important action that we wanted so much had been approved.

The meeting ended and I found myself still sitting on that padded pew like bench. I wanted to high-five someone, but everyone was leaving. I gathered my things, noted that the entire meeting had taken less than 50 minutes, and went out into the steamy, Pensacola evening. As I called John to share the good news, I felt a little cheated.

Well, let’s talk about something else.

Did you ever read the story about the couple getting engaged? The man put the engagement ring into the crystal goblet, expecting his sweetheart to notice the shiny diamond at the bottom of the cup, only to be stunned when she drank down the entire contents of the glass – ring included. I have no doubt that the girl was embarrassed as they walked into the ER to talk about retrieval “options.” But, the guy had to be shocked too. His big, romantic plan had been ruined in a single gulp.

You may have a similar story.

– The carefully selected Christmas gift that was put to the side as soon as they opened it. It was over so fast that you weren’t even sure that they knew what it was.

– The Thanksgiving dinner that looked like it should be featured in “Southern Living” and was eaten during the commercials of “the” football game.

– The lights for the house that, at the store, were promised to dance across the roofline and now only blinked at you from the garage side.

Well, let’s agree to laugh those off this year. Let’s enjoy the journey and not put so much effort into the glitter and smoked turkey. Let’s not try so hard to buy the perfect gift or sing the perfect solo or put the bike together on Christmas Eve. Let’s decide that it really is all about that warm hug, her kind smile, his happy giggle, and that silent night so very, very long ago.

Rest easy, My Friend, “Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord.” (Psalm 31:24)

Love, Jill (just one of God’s kids)

How did it get to be November 5^th already? I planned all year to start the “We Gather Together” series on November 1^st. What on earth have I been doing? Why can I not “get it together?” How can I ever encourage others if I cannot get myself on track? Aaaaaaak!!

Now, before you pick up that phone and dial my number, I am fine; I am not depressed; I am not even worried. But, I do need to explain myself.

On Sunday, November 1^st, I had a posting ready to go. Well, it was ready to go in my head. And, as I awoke on Sunday, I found that my head was not operational. Sometime during the night a cold had settled in my chest and sinuses and had robbed me of the possibility of doing any thinking. Yep, my plans for November 1 stayed locked in a brain and body which had been overtaken by a tiny, little bug.

When I woke on Monday, I knew that I needed to get to my computer ASAP. But, other activities crept in and my writing schedule was delayed. Soon, a battle waged between my plan and the overpowering forces of the cold and my ever growing “to do” list. Monday was gone before I got this thing done.

I won’t bore you with how I got to this moment in the week. Just know that you have been in my thoughts (and prayers).

Somewhere between the Halloween candy and the New Year’s Day bowl games, we are all going to experience a moment when the plan we have crafted, so very carefully, will not be completed.

• You may find yourself wondering if anyone will know that the angel costume you dressed that sweet child in for the Christmas program was, just a few weeks ago, a ghost costume with a little voice saying “boo.”
• Or, perhaps, if you place the KFC chicken into your own baking pan, smearing the sides of the pan with the drippings from the wax paper, you will fool your in-laws into thinking you can cook.
• And, maybe the early morning sports radio program will give you enough of the highlights of the “big game” that you can join in the conversation at work without having to admit that you slept through the entire second half.

Let’s agree that this year, this holiday season, we will forgive others (and ourselves) for not doing it all. This year, let’s start five days late knowing that it really is all about being thankful, about family, about joy, about mercy, about giving, about fresh starts, about sharing. And, most of all, it is all about love delivered in the form of a frail newborn in a humble stable with the echo of heavenly praises coming from fields guarded by shepherds.

Rest easy, Friend:  “For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.”  (Ecclesiastes 3:1)