It started happening with our Garmin a couple of trips ago. After we had entered our destination and “Miss Garmin” had navigated us to within a few miles of it, she got creative. She would direct us to go right (when our inclination was to go left) and then she would navigate us through a neighborhood, making turns here and there, until we winded up where we had been just a few minutes before. It was after we had completed this diversion that she directed us to our desired destination. It happened again yesterday. She sent us out of our way, through a rural area of houses and land, before taking us to the address we desired.

So, today we should have been ready for her “creative” navigation. We weren’t really in a rush. (That was a good thing because by the time we got to the place we had selected to go for breakfast, they were serving lunch.) And, she did her thing, sending us into areas that are truly “off the beaten path.” But, it didn’t bother us. My favorite line of the morning was when John looked at me and said, “I don’t know where we are going, but we are making good time.” We both laughed.

And, maybe having our navigation system direct us down a new path was exactly what we needed to do. I am reminded of our friends who are missionaries in a rural part of the world. One of them shared with me that when they board a truck or bus to go to a new destination, they don’t bother asking how long it will take them to get “there” or what route they are taking. They simply relax and enjoy the ride.

I can make myself crazy by trying to find the quickest way to do or to get something when often I am not sure where I am going or what I am seeking.

On this Friday, admit with me that we are blind to what God has ahead of us. And, rest easy that the one who made us knows the path ahead. No need to rush. His ways are best. He will not forsake us!

(God promises) “I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.” (Isaiah 42:16)

I was at the laundromat yesterday morning using their hot water and slightly warm dryers. I had planned a quiet morning of watching the laundry go round and round in the machines and working on a Bible study.

Laundromats have rules. There are the published rules (like no dyeing in the washer) and then there are the unpublished rules. One of those unpublished rules is to give other people as much space as possible. And so I headed toward a row of machines that I thought was not close to any others that were being used; I was wrong. After adding the soap and bleach to my machines, I discovered that an older man was using the equipment right across from mine. Because I had made a poor choice of machines, we had to do the Laundromat dance of working around each other, being careful to not bump into the other person’s laundry cart or spilling detergent on the other’s laundry.

The notice on the machine said that the price of a wash cycle was $2.50. There were five slots in which to insert quarters and so I put in five quarters. Now, I am, most days, not entirely stupid; this was not true as I put my money into this Laundromat slot machine. I couldn’t figure out where to put the other 25¢. (I can hear you saying, “Jill, You needed to put in $1.25 more, not 25¢ more.” Didn’t I just report that I wasn’t thinking as I did this?) The machine had no slots for the additional payment. I looked around and then noticed the older man watching me. I said, “The machine won’t take my quarter.” He replied, “You have to double up in the slots.” I nodded, added one additional quarter, and then found that the machine still didn’t work. I tried several times and then looked at him again saying, “It still won’t work.” He smiled and said gently, “You have to double up in all of the slots.” It was then that I realized that ten quarters were required, two in each slot. I smiled back at him and said quietly, “Thanks.”

As I left the washing machine area, I sought out a quiet place to work on my Bible study. But, I couldn’t stop glancing at my helpful friend. He had a lot of laundry to do – worn jeans, plain t-shirts, work shirts, socks and the lot. When he got clothes out of the dryer, I noticed that one, long sleeved shirt, with buttons and collar was carefully put aside and not folded; it was clear that this shirt was going on a hanger later. In between tasks, he sat quietly, his hands shaking in front of him. Twice his cell phone rang. The first time, I could hear a female voice speaking quickly and loudly. He explained that he needed more time to finish his wash. The second time, he answered the phone and walked outside. There, a young woman in a “fast car” drove up. They spoke for a few minutes and she sped away.

I didn’t get much done on my Bible study, but thought about what had brought him here on this morning. His hands were bent with arthritis and there were hard calluses on each finger. His shoes were worn, top and bottom, and his laundry basket was a plastic tub with a broken handle. He smiled and moved aside when the two small children, speaking Spanish ran by him. He wore no jewelry and he had missed shaving for a couple of days.

I couldn’t stop praying for him and thinking about him. He had been so kind to me. No grunts of frustration came out of his mouth when I broke the unwritten Laundromat rules and he had not laughed when I couldn’t figure out how to put $2.50 into the slots of the washing machine. He did not know me, but he was kind to me.

It struck me. I needed to thank him and to bless his life. Earlier this year, our pastor had prepared “blessing cards” for us to pass out as we blessed others. Noticing that he had gone into the men’s room, I pulled a “blessing card” from my purse, wrote a quick note thanking him for being so helpful to me, added some cash, and put it on top of a pile of laundry he had folded earlier. When he came back to his laundry, I was busy getting clothes out of the dryer. He caught my eye a few minutes later and quietly mouthed the words, “Thank you, thank you.” I smiled back and turned as my eyes filled with tears. I prayed that his day would go well.

Funny, I had thought that the blessing cards were to bless others. God had a different plan.

Psalm 34:8 says, “Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.”

I want to spend more time each day tasting and seeing God’s goodness!!

Several years ago, I fell at a restaurant. As quickly as I could, I got up and assured all around me that I was fine. We continued the meal and my friends and I said our goodbyes as we went to our separate vehicles. I crawled into the Explorer, being careful to keep my left shoulder as still as possible. It hurt; I hurt. And, I was more than a little embarrassed.

I drove away from the restaurant, headed back to work. I made a right turn out of the parking lot and a few minutes later realized that I did not recognize the buildings on the street. After a quick U-turn, I again started toward the office. But, I didn’t recognize the buildings going this way either; clearly, the first U-turn wasn’t the right thing to do. Another U-turn and I settled down, positive that I was going in the right direction. It was after the third U-turn that I began to appreciate that I was in trouble. I decided that I needed to continue going one direction. Eventually, I found my way back to my office.

Later, we understood just how badly I had injured my shoulder and surrounding tissue and muscles. It took more than 2 years of time, surgery and physical therapy to get “back to normal.”

But, the experience on the road that day taught me an important lesson: people in pain make poor decisions. I don’t remember my shoulder hurting that bad as I drove that day when in reality the pain had short circuited my thinking. I did not recognize a familiar area. I vacillated from trusting myself to having no trust in anything I did. I was embarrassed and did not ask for help that I needed. I made bad decisions.

People in pain may look just like they have always looked to us. They may speak and act as if nothing has happened. They may not ask for help; they may not even know that they need help. They may say over and over again “I’m fine.”

What can we do for them?

• Be patient.
• Be there.
• Be understanding.
• Be forgiving.
• And, as much as you are able, be Jesus.

John 13:34-35 says “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

A phrase has been going through my mind all day; ever had that happen? I just cannot get away from it. It might surprise you. Here it is: “You must be present to win.”

It’s a simple concept. Even if you have the winning ticket, you do not get the prize if you are not in the room when your number is drawn.

Too often I have left the room early and missed out. Sports fans know what I mean. Leave before the final tick of the clock and you may not see the very best plays of the game. (Recall this year’s Super Bowl?)  Readers of mystery novels can relate. Ignore sections in a book and the answer to the mystery makes no sense. Sales people have been there. Pull back your sales pitch early and the sale is lost.

So, why aren’t we present, why aren’t we there when the “big event” happens? Maybe the lure of a warm bed kept us from getting to work or to church on time. Or, perhaps the attraction of the internet kept us from paying attention during that important conversation. It could be that the green eyed monster (i.e., jealousy) stopped us from seeing the beauty around us.  Or, could it be that our self-conscious behavior quelled a budding romance?

Perhaps greatest treasures will come to us only because we got up a minute earlier or stayed a little longer.  Don’t miss out on God’s gifts.

The parable of the ten virgins, five wise and fives foolish is a great illustration of “you must be present to win.”
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+25%3A1-13&version=NIV

I don’t remember a time when I wasn’t involved in music. My first solo was in church at age 5 or 6. And, my first “big” solo came just a couple of years later, when I was in 2nd grade. The audience numbered about 300 and I sang a solo called “The Wedding of the Painted Doll.” I remember that it was 6 pages because when you are 7, the number of pages you have to memorize is important! With my “Shirley Temple” curls and my “fru-fru” dress, I stood at the front of the stage, stage left, while first graders acted out a wedding scene behind me.

Many years later, Poppa told me that his thought that night was, “Well, we never have to worry about her in front of a crowd.” I just remember being a bit irritated. You see, as the heavy curtains opened, the microphone stand got caught up in them and started to fall. I rushed my entrance a bit, grabbed the stand before it hit the floor, and set it aright. I remember hearing the audience gasp, worried that the young girl might be upset or frightened by the incident. No problem; I was just a bit put off that my song might be ruined because of that silly mic stand.

The only explanation I have for that early confidence is my parents. Mom and Poppa never pushed us, but they did teach us to practice, work hard, stand up straight, and to do our best.

Even with that great upbringing, I haven’t always felt comfortable being in front. And that brings me to my dilemma this Sunday. My music training was very traditional. I played classical violin; I played hymns on the piano; I sang four-part harmony; I even appreciate 4/4 and 3/4 timing!

A few years ago, our choir director turned to me one Wednesday night and said, “Jill, why don’t you take the solo in this choir song?” What on earth was she thinking?!?! This particular piece requires the soloist to be able to sing off the beat, to do a little ad libbing and to “be out there.” Was she having a mental break down? Didn’t she realize that she had pointed to CARLA JILL MULLINS STEIN???

I knew that there was no possible way that our director (whom we call “Fearless”) could know that I loved to sing American spirituals when alone in the car. But, those are songs between me and God. This performance was not going to be a private “car” song; this was a solo to be sung in church with the full choir. And so, I started practicing. But, it wasn’t until I stopped practicing and started praising that the song became a song between me and God.

I believe in giving our best to God. And so, singing this song isn’t something that I am casual about or approach in a sloppy way; it is just outside of my training, my experience, and (yes, I can hear you saying it) my comfort zone.

I love singing the song and, although it still makes me a little nervous, I am praying that our choir will “rock God’s house” with it this Sunday morning.

My desire is to quit being concerned about what I haven’t done before and to become fascinated about what God has for me to do today. Why don’t you and I agree to stop reliving, rehearsing, remembering what once caused hurt in our relationships and focus on the memories we can build today. Let’s stop holding back and start letting go. How about we tear down every barrier we have built to keep others at bay. And, while we’re at it, let’s give up worrying about how others see and think about us and just love them!

“Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy. Then it was said among the nations, ‘The Lord has done great things for them.’” (Psalm 126:2)

p.s. Want to have some fun? Join us at the 9:00am service this Sunday at the Pensacola First Church of the Nazarene!!

John and I have embarked on the biggest project of our married life. And, we need professionals to help us achieve our goals. To find the right people to help us, we went to a trusted friend, someone who has more knowledge in the field than we could ever have. And, we asked one question, “Who would you trust to do this job?” We knew that the best choice would be someone who lives a life of integrity, who is trustworthy. Knowing that the person we selected would be working to achieve the very best for us was much more important to us than was their experience or their education. We knew that for us to do this project well, we needed to establish a relationship of trust with those who would help us.

Relationship are not built on commerce; a relationship is not like the business transaction model of “if you do this, I will do that.” When two people do “business” together, with a goal to get the right price and quality of product, rules and schedules are set and inspections are conducted. When we have a relationship our focus is not on schedules, return on investment or related inspections.

Oh, it is true that from the outside a relationship can sometimes look a little like a business arrangement. One makes the dinner and the other clears the table. One mows the lawn and the other brings to them a cold glass of lemonade. But, relationships go so far beyond the “this for that” mentality. For example, the loving parents of a newborn will do everything for that child, knowing that what that the love they receive in return cannot be measured.   A caring friend will comfort and care for you without even thinking the cost of their service.

Relationships are not all the same.

Our relationships with those who are helping us with our project are fine, but they do not involve every aspect of our lives. We will trust our new friends with completing the task, but we won’t give our computer passwords to them.

My relationship with family is deeper and my relationship with John even deeper.

But, even John does not know my every thought or step even though he knows more about me than anyone else. And, I trust him completely. When I awkwardly explain something that is troubling me, he waits me out. He does not just listen to my words, but considers my stammering in context of my heart, my intentions and our love. We do not speak to each other as if we were on a witness stand in a courtroom, fearful that each word will be dissected and reviewed. When one of us forgets something, we do not think immediately that the other is hiding bad news or is developing a secret plan. We trust each other.

And, as deep as my relationship is with John, my relationship with God is even deeper. The God who I know and love offers me a relationship with Him. Have no doubt that He is in charge, but my God does not joyfully “smite” me for making a mistake. He does not expect me to be perfect at tasks that I am just now learning. He does not keep a secret list of expectations that I do not know and cannot achieve. Our relationship is based on love.

Are you troubled with a relationship in your life? Are you approaching it as a business transaction (“if you do this, I will do that”) or as a partnership of love? How about your relationship with God? Are you stuck in a “I will never measure up” mentality?  Why not start fresh?

Just remember that relationships with friends, family and even God require us to trust and to open our hearts. Trust me – you can do this!

“Come near to God and He will come near to you.” (James 4:8a)

I was watching an old TV show on Netflix the other night and a character had a great line, “Act like you have faith and faith will be given to you.” It was the author’s paraphrase of the amazing words of Christ in Matthew 21:22. I like the way how God’s Word Translation puts it: “Have faith that you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.” (Matthew 21:22)

Christ gave us this guidance after an incident with a fig tree. Bottom line: He found a fig tree to have many leaves but no fruit. It was a worthless tree. The purpose of the Christian life is to produce. And, by saying “have faith, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer,” Christ is telling us to be bold in our belief. He is looking to see if we act in faith in the way that He directs. Our acts, our produce is the proof: do we believe?  Do we have faith? Are we producing anything?

Or, are we just trees with leaves and no fruit?

As I read Christian references on Facebook and in emails, I wonder if we are just getting good at “feeling” Christian or “looking” Christian. For example, how should I react when I see a Facebook posting or receive an email of a picture of an amazing sunset with comforting scripture? Do I recognize the voice of the God of all creation, the King of Kings, or do I just enjoy the picture and get a nice warm feeling in my soul? Do I daily step out in faith, believing the word of God?

I struggle when I see Holy Scripture alongside swear words on websites or Facebook pages. It breaks my heart when I see a life that is only producing leaves – no fruit. I recognize the characteristics of that kind of life for I lived it and I strive to never be there again. I mourn when I see prayer requests forwarded without any indication of personal faith, without a belief that the God to whom we pray will answer our prayers. I worry that we may be distracted with the pleasant appearance of leaves, forgetting that if there is no fruit, the tree is not fulfilling its God-given purpose: to produce.

Leaves cover up the tree for a season, but then they are gone, leaving the tree bare, the branches visible. A tree that does not produce fruit is cut down and its place in the orchard given to another.

And, just hoping for fruit to appear in our lives is a vain pursuit.

Jesus said, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)

Friend, I am praying for fruit from our lives. It starts with uniting with Christ.

When I arrived in Pensacola nearly 33 years ago, I began working without thinking much about the people I would need to involve in my life. But, when my prescription for an important medication needed to be refilled, I found myself looking for a doctor. I asked my physician in Olathe, Kansas, for his recommendations. To no one’s surprise, my Kansas doctor had no contacts in Florida. But, he did some research and recommended that I contact a nationally known physician who practiced in my area. And, so I called that office to see if they would take a new patient who needed a prescription filled – fast!

The receptionist was sweet but firm. The “famous” doctor would be unable to add me to his already large list of patients. But, he had a new associate and perhaps I would consider her. I needed my drugs, had no other options, and immediately said “Sounds great. When is her next available appointment?”

The first time I met Diana Harris, I was impressed. She listened, she asked great questions, she took her time and she heard my concerns and my desires. And, for 33 years I found that her patient skills were always top notch. Diana knew me before I knew John. She struggled with me through weight loss and then she didn’t scold when I went through weight gain. She guided me long distance when I became ill while traveling and needed to select over the counter drugs that would get me safely through long flights and back into her office. She even gave me the name of her cleaning lady when the stress of work and life were aggravating health issues.

Last week, I called her office to set up an appointment and learned that she had retired. Yes, I need to find another care giver. But, before I do that, how do I say “thank you” to the woman who saw me only a few times a year but knew and remembered more about my life than almost everyone else. As I think about the letter that I will write, I know that no matter what I do, it will sound “hokey.” And, that’s OK.

Sometimes, our “thank you’s” are hard to write. It is easier to just assume that no one cares if we send a note, make a call, or buy the card.

But, even if no one reads the note, we should still write it. We need to reflect and remember and appreciate those who have cared for us.

“Then one of them, when he saw that he was healed, turned back, praising God with a loud voice; and he fell on his face at Jesus’ feet, giving him thanks. Now he was a Samaritan.” (Luke 17:15-16)

P.s.  I hope that Diana’s retirement is FANTASTIC!!

Several years ago, our pastor and I taught two groups of adults on Wednesday nights: he shared a Bible study with the men and I shared one with the women. It was a new and exciting experience for me and those women were amazing. We had a great time.

That fall, I taught a series that I titled, “You Control the Thermostat.”

Thermostats have caused many problems in relationships. Someone in the house likes it warm and someone else likes it cold. For women, especially as we get to “that age”, the thermostat can be a huge challenge.

When I drive by myself, I love adjusting the temperature control. At times, I will have it on full heat and then a few minutes later the AC will be on.   Sometimes I have the temperature set on full heat WITH the windows open. (I try to control myself when other people are in the car with me. But, as soon as they are gone,  the  temperature fun starts!!)

One Thanksgiving, John and I visited a friend in Montana and our rental car had the most wonderful feature – heated seats!! We later bought portable “bun warmers” for our own vehicle and eventually gave a set to my parents for those long Kansas winters.  Those heaters are great.

Control of the thermostat changes things.

In Galatians 5, Paul wrote: ^“You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.” (13-15)

We have a choice – we can love others or we can bite and devour them. It is entirely up to us.

So, when someone is being ill tempered and says “this is just how I am,” you know that they have chosen to be that way. And, when they (or we?) say, “I can’t help it,” we know that they (we) are not telling the truth.

It is the truth – we do control our own thermostat.

Admit it: You can do something to take part of the chill out of that relationship.  Do it today.

One day last fall I found myself driving from Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, to Staunton, Virginia. It is a wonderful drive across the northeast part of South Carolina and the southern part of Virginia. Very little time was spent on our nation’s interstate highways and I had time to see some of the sights around me. I remember so many images of that day:

• A sign: “we sell minnows and night crawlers”
• Men putting a new roof on a small church set back into the hills
• A woman feeding a “herd” of young pigs
• A sign: “Mega meat sale”
• Fall leaves
• K-Love on the radio
• A crew topping a huge tree
• The church advertising an upcoming “turkey shoot”
• The sign in front of a Mom and Pop store: “My heart is yours”

I really loved the “my heart is yours” sign and I have wondered why it was in front of that store. Maybe it was to celebrate a long-lasting marriage. Or perhaps someone was announcing a budding romance. Sadly, it might have been the cry of someone in mourning of a broken relationship or the loss of a loved one. On the other hand, perhaps the sign was announcing results of the turkey shoot or of the “mega meat sale.” (Sorry!)

As we go through our day, we see so many things. Too often we think that we understand what we see. Maybe, just maybe, we need to pause and let the story unfold or remain untold.

“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.” (I Corinthians 13:11-12)